one month

my daughter turned a month old on friday. time is going by so fast and even looking at pictures, i'm having a hard time realizing how her looks and expressions have changed so gradually into what they are today. i'm sure it's impossible to really catch every moment and even if you do, you're constantly playing catch-up and missing the present worrying so much about capturing what will automatically become the past. anyway, i've decided to just try and enjoy it as i go, write things down when i get the chance, and not worry so much about capturing every moment. that's what memories are for, right? though they're far from perfect, they have a way of reminding us of the best things in life. the pictures and writings just fill in the gaps (though i am very grateful for both).

so, in spirit of remembering... practically since birth, adelle has made this little noise that sounds like a mix between laughing and clearing her throat. i'm pretty sure it started when she needed to burp, but now she does it pretty much all the time and it just cracks me up. i think i'll be a little sad when she grows out of it. also, she's starting to respond more to things i do besides just getting quiet. for example, i've been singing christmas carols to her (she gets extremely calm when i sing silent night) and today jingle bells came on the tv so i started singing it to her. every time it came to the "hey!" part, i would lower her chin whenever i said it and she'd make a big grin. it was the first time she smiled in response to something rather than just smiling randomly or in her sleep. and now, for the past couple of days, when i look at her and smile, sometimes she'll give me just a little smirk. i just love watching her working so hard to slowly become the woman that she will eventually be. i feel blessed to be so connected to her life and am constantly going to try my best not to mess that up. this is the easy part, right? i definitely CAN wait for when she starts having her own opinions and realizing that i'm not perfect :P

yay for being a mom.

vote for our pictures!

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someday you'll see us again..

i'm sure it's completely normal, but i am a little bit afraid to take Adelle out to any public places. even church seems like too much of a risk for my little one's immune system (especially at this time of year), so since she was born, we've been at home for a great majority of the time. yesterday, she and i did venture out to my sister Lori's, where we took advantage of her nice camera and artistic eye to get a few cute pics of Adelle before she's too grown up and we forget how cute and little she is now. here are a few favorites (thanks, Lori!):

okay...

i said i would explain more about the whole birthing experience, so here it goes.

i went in monday night (the 17th) at 7:30 p.m. where they started the slow process. they did some things to prepare my body for labor (in hopes that those things would send me into labor without having to break my water). the next morning they let me eat breakfast, take a bath, then they started me on pitocin at 8:30 and broke my water at about 9. the contractions started coming and progressing very quickly. i got an epidural and by 1:00 i was already dilated to a 6, but they said the baby hadn't descended low enough yet. it took until like 7 that night for me to be dilated to an 8, but the baby still wasn't low enough because basically she was turned funny and kept hitting my pubic bone instead of being able to go under it. the doctor tried a few times to help the baby turn or help her get below the bone, but the baby had enough room that she just kept popping back up. dr. was very patient with my desire to not have a c-section and let us wait it out until about 12:30 a.m. when she checked me, the baby's head had swelled quite a bit and we finally decided that at this point the c-section was the best option to safely delivering a healthy baby. i was in the operating room by 1 and Adelle was born at 1:21 a.m. Wednesday morning, November 19th. it was really strange being able to feel all the pressure and pulling during the surgery, but not the pain. of course, after the surgery, the pain medicine they gave me apparently didn't work with my body, so for a bit, i could feel the entire pain of the surgery. i hope that's the only time i ever have to tell a nurse that my pain is at a 10. i don't want to dwell on that experience too much, but it is definitely not one i will soon forget.

we have had so much love and support and appreciate everyone who has visited, brought us dinner, or sent a kind note. we have had many meals provided for us and it has been such a help! we haven't gotten much sleep and we're still getting the hang of things (as we will be for the rest of our lives i'm sure), but we're so glad to have Adelle with us. it's crazy to think that yesterday was her due date and we've already gotten to enjoy her as part of our family for over a week now. we've been taking lots of pictures and will post more soon!

Adelle Madeline

She's here!! Our beautiful little girl Adelle was born Wednesday morning (November 19th, 2008) at 1:21 a.m. at 7 lb 7 oz and 20 and 2/3 inches long. I cannot tell you how blessed we feel to be her parents and cannot wait to see the person she will continually grow to be!

I ended up having to have a c-section, which I will explain more in-depth later.

I'm too tired to say much more right now, but here are some pictures from now. A picture from the operating room while they were stitching me up, then a few from today, day 3! Enjoy and more soon!

the time has come!!!

As some of you may know, throughout the later stages of my pregnancy, I have had an excess of amniotic fluid. Sometimes this indicates problems with the baby, but in this case they really don't know why, so no big deal, right? Well, when you have too much fluid, it makes it more likely for the cord to come out before the head and wrap around the baby's neck. This is something that can be taken care of during labor, but it's harder to do when the baby gets bigger. Since my baby is on the big side already (she was 6 and 1/2 pounds 2 weeks ago), the doctor and we have decided to induce.... on MONDAY! I go in Monday at 7:30 p.m. where they'll break my water, put me on some antibiotics (I have something called GBS), then the doctor thinks that itself might get my body into the early stages of labor without the more invasive stuff like pitocin, which makes your contractions more intense, etc. Anyway, by Tuesday morning if not much has changed, they'll help me along a little. I'm already dilated at 3 cm and partially effaced, so who knows what will happen.

So, now something that was just in the near future has an actual date or arrival! I felt like we were really ready, but at the same time, now I feel like we have so much to do this weekend to really get ready. We still need a changing pad and I need to pack my overnight bag for the hospital! I have a general list and have checked online, but any suggestions on things that would be nice to have there during the slow labor process? I think I'm going to make a mix CD because they have stereo systems in the rooms so I can listen to whatever I want during the labor :)

We are very excited and can't wait to meet our little girl so soon! Apparently she has a lot of hair already (Luke's part Native American). I can't wait to get her out of my belly and into my arms! Wish us luck!!!

260 days down, 20(ish) to go!

one pregnant woman + flu shot (sore arm) = only able to sleep on one side = aching back, legs, shoulders, etc etc etc. = lucky me.

i've never gotten a flu shot before yesterday. the nurse was NOT gentle either. she practically wound up before stabbing me in the arm. ah well. i suppose it's for my own good.

soon i will blog about my baby shower, which was on november 1st. it was really great and reminded me of how many amazing friends/family i have in the area. i am so grateful to have them! also, luke has been working on cleaning out the baby room to get it ready. he moved the recliner into the bedroom and a dresser into the baby room, so we're getting closer and closer to being ready for the little one!

according to my appointment yesterday, i'm dilated to 2.5 cm and some other signs (that may be a little too much information for some) are showing that the end is near. of course, that doesn't mean she'll come early and i kind of doubt she will, but we're excited nonetheless. we really have everything we need for now and other things we'll be able to get along the way. it's been really fun getting ready for her and i can't wait to meet her!

i voted.

did you?

hallelujah!!

well, we had another appointment yesterday, which brought another sonogram, and guess what! The baby turned on her own! She is officially head down, has dropped half the way (whatever that means) and so I guess that means it's very unlikely for her to turn again. I'm 1 and 1/2 centimeters dialated and 60% effaced, but really that doesn't indicate any time frame. It's just good to know that things are on track now, so yay. my due date 4 weeks from today!

Happy Halloween!

Tonight will be carving pumpkins, trunk-or-treat, parties, lots of fun! And then sleep, lots of sleep. Have fun and be safe!

our poor poor car

well, the summit is on its last limb. luke had to take the car to topeka the other day and at one point when he turned left, the switch decided to stay on ... forever. so, we are eternally turning left! we had to put duct tape over the left turn signal in the front and we took out the bulb for the signal in the back. since we're eternally turning left, that means we cannot switch it to turn right or use the emergency lights. we have to hand signal. it's fun ... anyway, i guess we knew it was coming because the wand for the turn signals has been loose for a while (which means something inside there is loose) and it doesn't beep anymore when we leave the lights on after turning the car off, so luke and i have both drained the battery, including today. in fact, we would be at our pre-admission appointment at the hospital right now if it hadn't happened again. thanks to friends (ali) who are willing to give rides home/jump the car for us. otherwise we'd have to miss our 4:30 OB appt too!

anyway, i know everyone loves the summit, but start saying your goodbyes. you never know, the next time you see her could be the last.

Halloween Bunko!

Every year around Halloween, my sister Lori and her husband Chris host a Halloween Bunko Party, which was held last night. Bunko is a dice game that is a lot of fun. Lori and Chris provide various simple costumes at the beginning of the night and this year Luke was a nerd and I was a "bather." Luke did a pretty good job of being in character for the pictures. Lori always has a great spread of snacks and treats as we play, then at the end of the night there are several awards pertaining to different scores of the game. Luke ended up with the overall highest points, so he went home with a bag of caramels (they're already half gone) and I came home with a pumpkin carving book/kit for rolling the last Bunko of the night. We both had a lot of fun!! Thanks Lori and Chris for a great night!

The boys got a little more into their characters than the girls... (Lori's taking the picture)

The first picture we've taken together in MONTHS.

still sideways

apparently the baby is just too comfortable. i don't blame her. i feel pretty comfortable in my body too (well, i did until it started hosting another person -- and yes, i say i am a host like someone would a parasite). she's still turned sideways in pretty much the same position she's been in for a while now. i know there is still hope and the doctor gave me some things i could do to at least feel proactive in getting her to turn. we'll see what happens... pray for head down!

luke and i had a random 'argument' today about what is defined as soda. i told him that it isn't soda if it's not carbonated. what do you think? i was drinking hi-c orange drink from mcdonalds and he called it soda. his argument is that soda that is flat is still soda, but i say it was made with carbonation! that's why it was called soda in the first place! anyway, i'm adding a poll to satisfy our disagreement (he said i could), so what do you think??

also, can i just say how much i LOVE fall?? we were driving downtown (home from the doctor's) and i think it was the first time in a while that i had really looked outside. i think my favorite (besides its beauty) is the crisp cold smell when it's dark out. i just love it. i probably mention it every year, but that is the reason i decided to make this new background. i like it.

yay for autumn and the season of holidays it brings!

hotcoldhotcoldhotcold

hot flashes are a myth. i am just constantly hot. today it has been especially bad, where just walking from one classroom to another makes me sweat. also, when i sleep, i have to frequently switch the side i'm sleeping on because i get so hot. it's fun. i'm glad that luke doesn't get cold easily because we sleep with 2 different fans on every night.

i haven't had much to blog about lately because i've just been working then going home and resting most of the time. last night i was at my sister lori's and her little girl elise was reading stories with us. she picked up a book and brought it to me and sat in my lap... she kept trying to scoot back so she could be closer to me, but my belly wouldn't let her! it didn't keep her from trying though... it was so funny (and a little sad for me).

this past weekend i went to the maple leaf festival with my parents and sister kelly. we met lori, chris, ava, and elise there and we had a good time. in the almost 17 years i've lived here, that was my first time experiencing the maple leaf festival! of course by the end i thought my legs were going to fall off and my belly was going to explode.

coming soon: the things i enjoy about being pregnant.

SONO #4, Anniversary

Yesterday was my 4th sonogram! This one was really thorough because they wanted to take all of the important measurements, etc, so it was about a half hour long. The nice sonographer even turned on the 4D camera for me and I cannot believe what technology can do! You shouldn't be able to know in such detail what your baby's face looks like before she's even born! Also, she took a picture that shows without any doubt that she's a girl, but I'll spare you of that one.



They found that she is about a week ahead in size (though I am guessing that may just be because she's going to be a big baby) and she actually is turned the wrong way right now. So, please pray for our little one that she will turn on her own in the next 2 weeks. If she doesn't, they will do something very painful where they give my uterus a shot to relax it (apparently the uterus is made to harden when it's pushed on) and then they will manually turn her over. And you know it's not pleasant if the doctor uses stronger words than "pressure" and "uncomfortable." It's going to hurt. PLUS it only has a 50% success rate, so there's still a great chance that after that I would have to have a C-section. They basically said that she's too comfortable in there (I guess I have a lot of amniotic fluid, so she has a lot of room in there), so she's not feeling the need to turn yet. So, we're praying and hoping that she will turn on her own before my next appointment in 2 weeks. Isn't she beautiful??


This past Sunday was mine and Luke's FIRST anniversary! I cannot believe a year has already past, but at the same time I can hardly remember life without him. I am so grateful to be in a happy, eternal, and loving relationship with my best friend. It was a great opportunity to pause and look at how much "us" has developed since that beautiful day in Nauvoo a year ago.



I woke up to a sparkling clean apartment, the smell of orange rolls that Luke had made (it's kind of a Sunday tradition that we enjoy), and Luke was setting up General Conference on the TV. For dinner we made one of our favorite meals, smothered burritos (a recipe my mom gave us - thanks!) So basically we celebrated with food and had a great relaxing day watching Conference and enjoying each other's company.

yummy generic brand orange rolls, our favorite!

yummy smothered burritos!

i never would've thought....

CHECK THIS OUT!!

Just make note that it does not specifically say Independence! It could be in any of the Kansas City suburbs, so no panicking! I am SO excited about this!!!!

______________________________on another note____________________________

Today marks ONE WHOLE YEAR that Luke and I have been married. It feels like we've been married so much longer than that. More on that later because I'm watching General Conference on the TV.

one day at a time

i've decided i'm not going to complain about all of the not fun things i've had to deal with in pregnancy. people say the 1st is typically the worst and i'm going to hope that's true. i will say that i am measuring 6 weeks ahead of schedule, so i have to have a FOURTH sonogram on Wednesday the 8th. we'll see what they say then, but i'm guessing i won't be having the baby too early. it all depends on how big she actually measures when we have the sonogram.

today has been an interesting day at work because almost every kid has acted out besides the girl i primarily work with (thank goodness). she has actually been extremely cooperative and willing to work today. we walked 8 laps around the gym this morning, which i think took all the fight out of her :) it's like President Hinckley would always say, that the best medicine is to go to work!

last night i decided to make pumpkin gooey cake because i'd had the stuff to make it for a long time. it is really not a healthy dessert, but is probably one of the most delicious desserts i've ever had. you can also substitute the pumpkin and have banana or pineapple gooey cake, etc, but i imagine you can't beat the pumpkin. so basically, i highly recommend it.

and... sunday is mine and luke's first anniversary (and it's General Conference weekend! yay!)!

a night of firsts

Tuesday morning I woke up at about 3:15 a.m. to throw up. In the following 3 hours this would happen 3 more times... and well, it happened several more times within that 12 hour period. I couldn't even hold down water and my temperature was slowly rising. Once my temperature got to over 100 degrees, we decided it was time to go to the ER. I was admitted to a room in the OB at about 9:00 p.m. where they hooked me up to a baby monitor and an IV (for hydration) and gave me some medicine in the IV for nausea so I could start to hold down at least something. The first place they tried to do the IV didn't work because I was so dehydrated (that makes your veins smaller), so they ended up putting it in my hand. Anyway, we were out of there around midnight and they put me on a clear liquid diet for 24 hours, so now I'm just at home resting and trying to be as nourished as possible on my water, 7up, and chicken broth. I felt MUCH better by the time we left the hospital and am slowly feeling better and better. I should even be back to work tomorrow.

So, last night included a lot of first time experiences for me. It was my first time going to the ER, first time being admitted to the hospital, first time to have to ride in a wheelchair, first time to have an IV, first time to be hooked up to a baby monitor.

I'm glad to be home and that I'm able to hold down liquids now, so yay.

Eternally connected

I was sitting on the loveseat after school today, finishing an episode of Friends from Season 7 (Luke and I have been working on watching the whole show all the way through), when little Baby Girl started kicking me right in the middle of my belly (about 2 inches above my bellybutton) several times. After about 20 seconds of kicking, I put my hand on the spot where I felt her, only to feel her not kicking but rather pushing back on my hand. For about 10 more seconds we were connected in that way until I felt her shift to another position. I cannot begin to describe how powerful that 10 seconds was. I can't really explain it, but it's pretty easy to forget that not only is that a real soul inside of me, spirit and flesh, but it is my daughter. I am a mother and through the power of God have provided for this child of God to have her turn on earth. It makes me wonder how much she already understands about who she is and her relationship to me and Luke. It makes me wonder if she just likes the sound of Luke laughing or if she responds because she understands that she's his baby girl. It makes me wonder how much she still remembers from the preexistence where she dwelt with God. Maybe she already knows me and I'm the one who has just forgotten. I cannot wait to teach her that she is a daughter of God and to teach her about her incredible divine worth. I already love her so much and can't even imagine how exponentially that love will grow in the years to come. I hope I'll always be able to remember these feelings of gratitude to my Heavenly Father as the time grows closer and closer to finally meet our little one.

it's officially...

...a GIRL! we got to take another look at our baby today and now we know for sure! so yay! I uploaded the pictures they gave me at two of the sonograms, so here they are:

18 weeks... pretty much a skeleton baby. this made us giggle a little about how creepy it looked. That's the front view of the face on the left side, then the left hand to the right of that (she was kinda laying on her stomach).


And then this one is from today, so 1 day short of 27 weeks. Luckily her cute little cheeks have filled out some, so she doesn't look like a skeleton anymore. So that's the front view of her cute little face on the right, then she's curled up with her knees to her chest, which is what you see on the left.

Things I've learned about parenting today:

1. Without consequences, we cannot learn.

We have a student who has been nothing short of difficult since the first day of school. If anything is expected of him or he is asked to do anything at all, he throws a complete fit. It starts out just whining and yelling, but when he doesn't get what he wants, he very quickly escalates into throwing things (not little things, but like computers, phones, etc) and hitting anyone he can get to. The best part is that his mother has issued a hands-off policy with this student, meaning if he hurts other people, we cannot restrain him or put him in a time out room. Today, as soon as he got here, he was spurting out things that his mom had apparently been saying about us over the weekend. He has autism. That's what he does -- repeats everything he hears. He is a smart kid and can recognize when there is tension, so already he knows that there is tension between his mom and the people at school. So, whose side is he supposed to take? It got to the point where the school administration had to be in there, taking away everything he could use as a weapon and separating him from the para he'd been beating on all morning. Then, they called his mom to come in, where she began to give him ice for his self-inflicted pain and stroke his hair, telling him everything would be okay. That calmed him down for a little bit, but that is after a para had to go to the hospital with 2 black eyes, a migraine, and many bruises, etc, phones and computers were broken, and the rest of the classroom got cheated out of a morning of learning. He has had no consequences for his actions, so how will this cycle end? Everything we try to accomplish at school is contradicted at home, as well as the integrity of our work being questioned, so how does she expect her son to ever succeed?

That's all I have time to write for now, but as you can see, it's been a long day.

back to school

Well, I've been back at my normal job since last monday, which would explain some of the lack of posting. A lot has happened in the last couple of weeks, but I won't mention all of it. I am alive and well, though it's getting harder every day to sleep comfortably. I'll take time to post pictures and more detailed info about my whereabouts, but here are some things to mention now.

• my little brother Eric was ordained an Elder this past Sunday. yay for that. congrats, Eric!
• we're almost completely unpacked finally. our bedroom looks much better now than it did a week ago, that's for sure.
• Luke also started work last Monday at a junior high in town. He works in their library as a computer lab tech, which he seems to be enjoying for the most part.
• Reading scriptures and praying everyday with your spouse really does make a difference. We have recommitted and I am glad.
  

And well, YAY FOR THE OLYMPICS! I've really enjoyed watching the different events and am so impressed with the persistence and diligence these athletes have! I am especially proud of the several USA swimmers who have received medals. I don't even need to mention Michael Phelps, but I will, because wow! That 7th gold was so intense with him winning by 1/100th of a second! I just couldn't believe it! And I cried at the All-Around female gymnastics competition where we won the gold AND silver. So cool. The past week we've really been coming home, taking a nap, then watching the Olympics until it's over. I don't know what we'll do when they're over :P

Also, I have to say that one person really does make a difference. We got a new teacher in our classroom this year and it has already caused so many positive changes. I didn't want to go back to this classroom at first, but with this change I think it's going to be a great (though still PLENTY exhausting) year. Yay for that. Oh, and I strongly believe that our department should be warned about fire drills... I had a student break down into a complete anxiety attack today. She completely lost control screaming, crying, biting down on her hand as hard as she could, flailing her limbs, etc, and it took me quite a while to get her to listen to me enough that I could pull her out of her chair and get her to walk outside with me. It was about 20 minutes before she could even start to settle down. It is so hard to see what little control these kids have sometimes. I am grateful to understand God's plan, especially that there was a pre-existence where we dwelled with God and were able to make decisions about our time on earth. I know that the physical, mental, and emotional strains these kids experience are only temporary and that they will be blessed in the eternities because of their willingness to endure those things.

ramblings of a pregnant woman

My husband is one of those people who can't wait for birthdays, so basically I already got my birthday present from him (my birthday isn't until August 29th), which was a new camera! To show my excitement concerning said camera, I will display a preview of our living room as it is so far. I'll post better pictures later once the whole apartment is put together.



And, to prove that I am truly a pregnant woman, I will display my favorite dessert at the moment. Yes, those are fruity pebbles and this is one of the few sweet things I crave. It's hard not to be jealous of something so awesome. To make it really good, you'd have to mush up the cookies and mix it all in together. Yummy.


That is all!

a word to the wise

So, we are done with the horrible excuse of an apartment forever and are in our much much better apartment now, trying to get everything unpacked. We've made quite a bit of progress, but there is still a long way to go! I'll take pictures when we're finally situated.

Now comes the word to the wise. While it seems beneficial to borrow a truck from a friend who was more than willing to give it up for us, it is NOT beneficial to then lose the only copy of the security-coded key. Luke is notorious for wearing cargo shorts where things just fly out of his pockets from left to right and this loose key was no exception. We called the doctor's office, checked the car, tore apart the apartment (as much as we could), and no luck. So, now we've called Ford and asked about the cost to get a new key made... they all say, well if you have one copy of the key, it's much cheaper. otherwise we'll have to make 2 copies of the key and you'll have to pay for both of them. I kept thinking, would I really be calling you if there was another copy of the key!? That was yesterday.

So last night, as I was trying to falling asleep, which really didn't take too long, I felt the strong urge to check in the car one last time before getting the truck towed to Ford today. I got up, threw on some clothes and trekked out to the already toasty car to search one last time. Was in the compartment in the side of the driver's door? No. Was it under the driver's seat? No. Was it under the back seats? No. Was it under the passenger seat or in the compartment of the passenger's door? No. Anyway, I was about to give up and go inside (it was pretty hot by then), when I noticed a strange piece of black clothing in the compartment to the side of the back seats. I reached in to see what it was and what fell into my hands? The key!!! I literally yelled out "Hallelujah!" and couldn't help but smile at that point. I really thought we were never going to find it. Anyway, a lot of prayer and thought went into this search and I am grateful to Heavenly Father for hearing my plea and I know that is why I was so drawn back to the car this morning. I didn't think about looking anywhere else but there and I know that is because our Heavenly Father can direct our thoughts to the things we need to be focusing on right in the moment. Anyway, that is the story of the lost key and I am so glad it has a happy ending (Except I'm very sorry to Casey, who was very gracious in letting us use it in the first place, for being out of a car for an extra day because of this)!

On another note, Luke and I are going to Olathe tonight to celebrate the homecoming of my very dear friend Jenn from her 18 month mission for our church in Fresno, California. I cannot wait to see her and I can't wait for her to meet Luke!!!!!

it's a...

well, it's an 85% chance girl! the doctor was pretty confident that it was a girl, but said she didn't get a convincing enough look to say she was 100% sure. and now she wants to look AGAIN during our next visit. sheesh.

we're pretty sure it's a girl! haha... it's hard to rely on 85% so we still feel pretty up in the air about it. it was fun to take a little look at the baby though!

Walmart & Target bags everywhere!

Well, since we don't get the newspaper, we decided to use all the Walmart and Target bags from under our sink to pack all the fragile things. So far it's working well and we have many to spare. Every time I finish a box, I get this gratifying feeling like we're that much closer of getting out of this dump and well, yay for that. And while a house is a LONG way off for us still, I feel like this is a move up for us, which is definitely a good thing.

Some of the things I REALLY like right now:

• Walmart brand vanilla ice cream (it's Blue Bunny just in a cheaper box, did you know?) with crunched up Golden (vanilla instead of chocolate) OREOS in it. YUM.
• www.failblog.org - SO FUNNY.
• free digital scrapbooking websites (I can link to some in a later post if you're interested)
• duct tape
• feeling the baby move pretty much every day now
• finding Ben Folds Five (the CD with the piano on the cover) for $3.50 at Goodwill - I'm SLOWLY rebuilding my CD collection since all my CDs got stolen earlier this year, which includes burning copies of a lot of the ones I had backed up on my computer.
• all the boxes Becky collected for us from work (THANK YOU!!!)
• using large plastic totes for moving

I am really looking forward to this next week. We get out of this dumpy place on Tuesday, then my best friend Jenn gets home from her mission on Wednesday!! Also, Luke's brother is coming into town and staying with us starting Tuesday night and my little brother Eric and brother-in-law Chris have a birthday on Thursday. MOST IMPORTANTLY, we have an OB appointment on Wednesday, which will include another sonogram, meaning we better find out the gender of our child this time! If not, we'll live... and we'll be able to tell said child many stories of how difficult it was before it was even born (I hate that I have say it), but we're hoping!

It's going to be a very busy week, but a good one for sure. Wish us luck!!

you see...

the purpose of the poll was to help us deal with the fact that it's 50/50 and have to wait until the 30th to find out the gender of our child! this tied at 24 nonsense isn't helping the suspense any! :P

i thoroughly enjoy working on saturdays (no i don't) because it's extremely slow... i've only had 3 short calls in the past hour. it forces me to find alternative ways to pass the time. one of my favorites is eating the food that luke packs for me pretty much on a daily basis. he's cute. he made the mustard on my sandwich into a smiley face.

yesterday luke and i went to see the dark knight (that's the batman movie, for anyone living in a cave) for a little day date. i cannot tell you how well-done that movie was! especially heath ledger. it is definitely unfortunate for the movie scene (and his family, etc) that he is gone, but i will say that this is by far the most powerful and convincing role i've ever seen him in. even if the character was extremely creepy and psychotic, i'm glad that he will be remembered for this.... and he absolutely will. overall it was a very well made movie and i was impressed. i would definitely recommend it.

i've been thinking a lot about the things i want to accomplish before the baby comes. some of them are on hold until we find out the gender, but i'm excited to start working on some of these things:

• I've mentioned before that I want to learn how to make a quilt for my baby... I'd like it to be a gender-specific blanket, so that's on hold until after the 30th, though I'm very excited to do it.
• I would like to get caught up on my scrapbooking, especially the holes in my high school scrapbook, like showtime, prom and graduation. those are big ones... and part of being able to do that deals with actually getting those pictures from people who actually have them.
• Organization! Right now our second room is just full of unorganized stuff. I'd like to clean it out/get everything organized so that when we move, we'll actually be able to use it as a nursery (which will be practically empty until we find out the gender and start finding furniture).

those are the main things i would like to work on. i would also like to go through and get rid of a lot of stuff we never use before we move, so that we're not just lugging a bunch of junk with us.

am i too ambitious? we'll see, but i'm excited to get started. that counts for something right?

do you have any project/"spring cleaning" goals that you're working on?

blech.

So we're moving into a new apartment on the 28th and I CANNOT WAIT. i'm really sick of the poor condition of our apartment. even the air quality is poor... it will be really nice too to live on the side of town where our new place is. We have a lot to do before then, but we're up for it.

I'm having kind of a rough day, just not feeling great, so I'm going to follow Kaysi's example and post a yay list for today, although mine might be slightly more surface level because my brain is near shutdown level.

yay for:

• Luke
• banana bread
• Waffle Crisp cereal
• blogging
• Lori letting me borrow lots of maternity clothes
• getting to move into a better apartment in 2 weeks
• vitamins
• Mary in HR who gave me some cheerios to snack on
• not having to work tomorrow (it's kind of strange having Fridays off instead of Saturdays)

what makes you say yay today?

traditions

i've been thinking a lot lately about traditions. my family doesn't have a lot of formal traditions, but we get together for every holiday and celebrate birthdays together. one of my favorite family traditions is Dirty Santa. every Christmas Eve (or Christmas day if people have other commitments on Christmas Eve), each of us contributes an anonymous gift so we can do a white elephant gift exchange. each year there are a couple of repeat gag gifts and we always have a lot of fun doing it. anyway, i want to begin our own traditions as our kids are growing up. i came across some ideas on a baby website recently and here are a couple of the ones i liked:

• Create a "YES Jar". Into it, put all the "NO's" that you're willing to put off until another day: "NO, you can't go to the zoo." "NO, you can't stay up late." Choose one day a month where your child can pick out a few "NO's" and turn them into "YES." "YES you can have ice cream for dinner." "YES you can skip your bath."
• For birthdays, let each family member choose his favorite meal. Then everyone but the birthday boy helps make it. Or write a letter to your child every year on their birthday. Give them the stack when they're 18 (or in my case I'd probably put them in a scrapbook or something like that).
• Give each child a new pair of pajamas on Christmas Eve.

do you have any favorite traditions that you hope to pass down? i'd love any thoughts, ideas, or feedback...so leave a comment.

the atrocity of daytime television

At the beginning of the month, Luke and I changed to $10 cable where we just get the limited network channels, you know so we could cut down on some expenses. I have Fridays off from work and instead work on Saturdays and when I sat down to eat my breakfast in front of the TV, there was NOTHING on, so much so that I ended up leaving it on QVC because there really was nothing better to watch. I'm sure it sometimes has good things on it, but today it's ugly jackets and clothing lines, as well as now big ugly bug windchimes... I just don't know how they get people to spend so much on items that are so unnecessary. They just stand there and talk about how great they are and say "almost sold out..." over and over again and then it's "this type sold out, so hurry and get the other type," convincing people to buy things that are not only ugly, but overpriced and completely unnecessary for life. Yikes.

Happy Belated Independence Day!

HAPPY 4TH!

I finally got my camera back from my parents' house, so it's time to see some of our 4th of July festivities.

Introducing my newest nephew, Nathan. I got to spend some time holding Ashley and it made me think a lot about 4 1/2 months from now when it's my turn!

Everyone brought something to share for our little 4th of July cookout. Here's Ryan enjoying some black cherry jello.

We had lots of yummy treats, including watermelon, canteloupe, rice crispie treats, root beer floats, and s'mores! Elise had fun eating her watermelon.

The kids had fun jumping on the trampoline, even though it made their feet turn black. Even after Kate's daddy washed off her feet (those are Kate's feet), she came outside and wanted to get right back on.

We did get a few small fireworks for our own entertainment and set them off in the backyard. Ryan and Elise especially enjoyed them... here's Ryan just sitting in his lawn chair enjoying the view.

Ava was less than excited about the fireworks. At one point we found her under the trampoline with her hands just like this over her ears. She eventually just went inside because she couldn't take it anymore (most of the ones we got weren't even loud, but she didn't care). The little smirk on her face is because I couldn't help but laugh a little about how scared she was.

I guess I don't take very many pictures of adults when my cute little nieces and nephews are around... maybe I should work on that. It was a great holiday and helped us to be grateful for the many freedoms we enjoy!

there is a very high correlation between my mood and my food intake. today i forgot to bring my lunch to work and i've just been a little irritable all day. i did go get lunch, but i usually have snacks here during the day and i've accidentally deprived myself of that. let's just say i cannot wait for dinner time!

for everything there is a time and a season

For 4th of July, we went to my parents' house to have some festivities. We did a cookout, then just hung out, lit off some fireworks, and then my fam headed to the city fireworks. Luke and I planned to go to the city show, but we waited a little too long to get there and it was just ridiculously packed. The parking was a nightmare and neither of us had the energy or patience to wade through the traffic, so we just decided to go home. I had to work the next morning anyway. But it was a fun holiday and any holiday is good if you get to spend it with family, which we did. I took some pictures, but I accidentally left my camera at my parents' house, so I'll post pictures at some point.

Today was the great day where most of the EFY counselors were in our ward, since the KU session starts tomorrow. I saw so many familiar faces and it was really fun to catch up with them. I really loved the EFY years and learned so much about myself, about the youth of the church (who truly amaze me), about teaching, and so much more. Seeing the counselors today was a great reminder of that. I hope the weather cooperates with them this week. KU is always a rough session when it comes to the humidity and heat.

Yesterday marked 9 months for mine and Luke's marriage. It's crazy to think that we've just now been married for the amount of time it takes to have a baby. BUT I'm in my 20th week, so come Friday my pregnancy is halfway over! So far, the time still seems to going by quickly, but I'm sure that feeling will change come October or so. The only awkward part of it right now is that yes, I'm showing a bit, but I'm still at the stage where people might think I'm just getting kind of fat in the belly. Ah well.

I'm becoming more motivated to get some things done before the baby comes. I guess I'm starting to realize how different life will be once that happens... especially at first I'm not going to have much time to be concerned about anything else. So, I guess this is the time.

sono attempt #2

we had our doctor's appointment today and i have to say that i really love my OB. she makes it very obvious that she LOVES what she does and that she really knows what she's talking about. we let her know that our first sonogram (which was at the hospital) was not so successful in the gender-finding attempt, so she had us schedule our next appointment at the very end of the day so that we'll be able to take our time to get another look. i'm really glad that i have such a great doctor who is willing to do that for us. a lot of doctors would just say sorry, insurance only covers 1 sono, and just send you on your way.... i just hope baby decides to cooperate this time. we want to start our planning! anyway, that appointment is july 30th, so now we have to wait until then!

PICTURES! (well, a few)

SUMMER... so far.

May 25, 2008: First, my brother Eric's high school graduation. I didn't get many good pictures because it was inside Allen Fieldhouse and the lighting was horrible.

Here's Gina, Mom, and Kelly laughing about how HORRIBLE one of the speeches was (and it wasn't even by a student..) Congrats, Eric!

June 7, 2008: Ava's 3rd birthday party. Ava had a kitty party, so all the little kids got their faces painted and had ears and tails. Lori is a great kid party planner and had everything going with the kitty theme.

It looks like she wants to eat the entire cake by herself.

Elise's favorite part was when they got to reach into the "fish bowl" for fish. They were little clear plastic fish that the kids all got to paint. She loved doing this so much that she cried out bloody murder when Grandma put the fish bowl away.

An impromptu Ring Around the Rosie.

Grandma holding her newest granddaughter, Ashley Nicole (daughter of Craig and Vanessa).

I haven't gotten any pictures yet of Nathan Mark, the now newest member of the family, who was born on Monday. Congrats to Kevin and Gaia!

it's a....

mystery!

We had our sonogram today and we have a beautiful healthy baby. Unfortunately, this little one is just a bit shy and had the legs crossed, so we still don't know the gender! I'm measuring about perfectly, but they do predict the due date to be 11/27 instead of 11/28. We got to see the baby stretching the fingers and then moving them into a fist several times, then moving the leggs and feet, kicking into my bladder :P It was a very cool experience, even if we didn't get to find out the gender yet. Hopefully we'll get a chance to later!

I finally got the cord necessary to put my pictures on the computer, so more to come soon!

work, father's day, sonogram

i'm sorry about the mushiness of my last post... luke doesn't even read my blog, so i like to gush about him a little every now and then. today i watched the movie P.S. I Love You that we had gotten from blockbuster a few days ago and if you want to feel more appreciative of the time you share with your spouse, then watch it, but as a warning i will say it made me cry a few times (maybe that was just the hormones).

well i'm done with my 2 weeks of training at work and ended up being the first (out of 40 in the training) to pass the 3 tests we were required to take at the end of it. i finished nearly a half hour before the next person in my class finished (they gave 3 chances to pass each test, so some people had to go back and make corrections), so since i got done early, i had time to set up my cubicle (oh so exciting..) and then my supervisor wouldn't let me do anything! she made me listen to other people taking calls, which might be the most boring thing ever. it also didn't help that the people i sat with kept giving wrong information or giving out information we've been told not to give. one girl had colored pencils and paper, so while i listened to calls, i drew a picture for luke. tomorrow i start my regular schedule and i really hope she lets me just get on the phone. that would make the time go by much faster.

for father's day, we got together at my sister lori's house and just played games and had snacks. luke and i pre-ordered season one of the old get smart show (from 1965) for my dad because it was one of his very favorite shows and i'd watch it on nick at nite with him when i was younger. in casual conversation tonight he actually brought up that he had looked up buying the whole series and it costs at least $200 if not more, so he laughed when he found out what we got him. i don't think the movie will be anything compared to the show, but steve carrell can be pretty funny, so we'll see.

i can't believe we have our sonogram in less than 2 weeks (6/27)! i really hope they'll be able to tell whether it's a boy or girl... i just think we'll be able to get to know the little one a little better once we know the gender and can really think concretely about names and planning.

this has just been a ramble blog and i could write much more, but i'll save it for when i'm not so sleepy.

LUCAS

i've decided that my husband is really cute. i think it's really cute that he gets dorky excited about MARVEL and basketball. i think it's really cute how excited he is about becoming a dad. i think it's really cute how hard he tries to pretend like he's too cool to care (he's so transparent). i think it's really cute that luke is learning to play the guitar and the piano. he comes home every evening from class and diligently practices his chord progressions and scales. tonight i had fallen asleep for a few minutes, only to wake up to luke sitting at the edge of the bed singing me a song on the guitar that he of course was making up along the way. i've been thinking a lot about the time that we get to share together right now and i really do cherish it. in just several short months the dynamic of our family will change, but i hope we never get so busy that we start to ignore those "us" moments that just make us smile and laugh.

sunday ramblings

today at church i had an interesting blast from the past... it was a great reminder of how grateful i really am to be married to luke and to feel so much love and joy when i am with him. i really love him and though i may not always mention it when i write here, i really do enjoy every day that i am with him. even when we argue (it happens) or are grumpy about something, at the end of the day, at least i am with someone who means enough to me to want to work every day to have a better relationship.

Confession of the Day: i really like cheesy kid movies. a short list of examples: Cheaper by the Dozen (1 & 2),Yours, Mine, and Ours, and most things with Amanda Bynes (She's the Man, What a Girl Wants, Sydney White)

and yay for my husband for making me a delicious grilled cheese (and for very thoroughly cleaning the kitchen on Friday).

while i do not love hearing the same things over and over again in my training class, i do not actually hate any of the people in it. it can be extremely frustrating, especially when the trainers themselves act like the only people who even have to call our number is because they are stupid and can't read. it is kind of disappointing how some people are at this job. i know it's not a glamorous thing to be answering people's questions on the phone, but i can pretty much guarantee that if you have a bad attitude about it, it's going to suck that much more. i'm actually kind of excited to get on the phones, so i can actually be useful. i know it won't be particularly fun, but people can tell when you hate the fact that you have to talk to them on the phone and it will only make them grumpier back at you!

yesterday we had a doctor's appointment and i'm supposed to eat more protein at night so i don't feel so yucky in the mornings. AND.....

june 27th is our sonogram where we find out the gender! yay! that's in just 3 weeks! obviously, we are very excited about this. we've been talking about names some, but 1. it'll be easier to really think about it once we know the gender and 2. we're not going to share them until the little one is born.

yay for babies.

the people i work with are not all smart.

Dear Training Class,

You are slowly killing me. I know you don't quite understand every little thing they mention, but that is because they are not very good trainers, so I would appreciate it if you would stop asking so many stupid and unnecessary questions. 'Overview' means they will go into further detail in the future and I do not have much interest for the personal stories and examples you have provided for all of us to hear. We may be a captive audience, but we do not like it and want to poke you with pens every time you raise your hand or say "Well, what if...". Also, every time you try to sound smarter than you are, we can tell you're just pretending. It hurts our brains, our hearts, and especially our ears. 'Oftener' is not a word and it's 'repetitive,' not 'repetitious.' Really. You make my mind wander to the time when I will be on the phone talking to the people who will ask me stupid questions and yell at me for something that isn't my fault. You make me look forward. To that time. Really. I know you're going to show up tomorrow, but it would go so much quicker if you just wouldn't. Oh, and just because you have a physical disability doesn't mean you should take advantage of the people who are being kind and offering to help you. I understand that there are things that cause hardship for you, but that doesn't mean you should expect people to wait on you hand and foot. Class, at the end of day 2, I realize that it will only get worse, but please consider that my head wouldn't be pounding if it wasn't for you. Then maybe I wouldn't have to write you this grumpyface letter. I don't look forward to seeing you soon.

Drop dead,
Heidi.



p.s. It's easy to enjoy being at home when we actually keep things clean. Yay for our clean (but still dumpy) apartment! :)

I have removed what I wrote about Kirby Heyborne. While I understand there are strong feelings about the subject, I would rather not my blog be a source for argument, especially between people who I've never met. That is definitely not why I posted my opinions here.

date night

a success, i would say. tonight luke and i had a little date night and went to see Iron Man in the movie theater for a second time and we still love it. we got home in time to watch the rest of the boston celtics game against the detroit pistons (yay celtics won!) and look forward to the finals between the celtics and lakers (go celtics!). it's true, luke has gotten me hooked on the NBA. i even catch myself watching it when he isn't even here. while we watched the game, i chopped up the strawberries we got a couple of days ago at the grocery store and had some ice cream with fresh strawberries and banana, which obviously was delicious. i just can't wait until i get to the point in my pregnancy where i can actually finish something in one sitting (the rest is in the freezer waiting for me).

i'm starting to feel much better. i still wake up feeling really hungry (and so, a bit nauseous), but as long as i eat something as soon as i get up, it usually turns into a pretty good day. i'm getting more energy and not quite as picky, so i'd say i'm doing well. everyone said i'd like the 2nd trimester better, but i didn't believe them until i could feel it for myself. i start my new summer job on monday, so all of this optimism could quickly turn, but i'll just enjoy it for now.

good times had.

my belly has been filled with lasagna and delicious chocolate cake with strawberries. i can go to sleep happy :) thanks janae!

.....

umm... I just saw the RM on a beer commercial.

LAME.

stress-be-gone

i've noticed that luke and i have really enjoyed each other's company more than usual these past several days. yesterday he and i went and walked downtown for a bit and went to a couple of other stores. he convinced me to buy white sunglasses (i promised myself i never would, but all the others made my face look funny) and we just had a good time in each other's company. yesterday evening we went to luke's brother matt's house for a little cookout. we brought our karaoke American Idol game and 2 microphones with us and we basically played that from 6:30ish after dinner until just after 11 (i think they like that game...). we left it there so they could keep playing and apparently, matt and ash stayed up playing it until 2:30 in the morning! we had a lot of fun.

i don't know if this boost in our moods has been the presence of his family, but i'm guessing it's the lack of having to work at the school: a HUGE source of stress for the both of us. the kids can be a handful some days, but that's so much easier to shrug off at the end of the day than when it's your co-workers who make you have a bad day. i have had to miss some work due to the illnesses of the first trimester and while my supervisor has been fairly supportive (his wife just recently went through the same thing), there are some co-workers who pretty much just stopped talking to me or would keep track of the days i missed, etc. now tell me this, who in their right mind would want to show up to that every day? not me. it just makes me sad when people feel like they could even possibly know what is going on in another person's life to the point that they can form opinions about it and treat them poorly for it. that is why i have put in for a transfer to another school in the district. i started crying on the last day of school just thinking about having to go back to that place in a few months to the point that i couldn't even enjoy the fact that it was the last day of school. i'm really glad to have that source of stress out of my life, at least for the time being... and i pray that the transfer will go through. granted you have to deal with coworkers wherever you go, but i can't think of many things that are more painful than someone being your friend until you actually need them to be one.

on another note, luke and i finally get to go see our new baby niece this evening. i can't wait! i've only even seen a couple of tiny pictures on my sister's digital camera, so this is a long-awaited visit.

also, congratulations to my baby brother Eric who graduated from LHS on sunday! he was very sharply dressed and did a cute pose for the photographer as he walked through the line. we were there rooting for him and MAN were we sweaty in Allen Fieldhouse by the end. this marks the end of the era... the last kid in our family has finally graduated from high school! congrats, Eric!

yay for family. yay for Luke. yay for summer. yay for downtown. yay for Penny Annie's. yay for blogs. yay for prayers.

girl's night, Ashley Nicole

Last night, all the girls on Luke's side of the family went out to dinner while the boys were at Matt's (Luke's brother) house playing games and watching the kids. We went to El Mezcal and just stayed there chatting for a while, then went back to the hotel where some of them were staying and continued our chatting. I felt really comfortable around all the girls (Luke's mom Laura and sister Sarah, a friend of Sarah's, 2 sisters-in-law and me) and we just had a good time. I'm glad I get along with everyone and we can just have fun and not worry about anything. I feel like I really am part of the family and considering we haven't even been married a year, that is a good thing. Tonight we're going to karaoke (one of Laura's favorite things to do) and I can't wait. She gave me a challenge to sing better than her...

Yesterday evening at 6:05 p.m., my brother and his wife, Craig and Vanessa, had a little baby girl, Ashley Nicole. She was 7 1/2 pounds and 19 inches long. I can't wait to meet her!

And those interested in a pregnancy update, I have completed my 13th week and today have moved into 14, so I am 13 weeks along. My next appointment is June 4th, then the appointment after that (approximately 4 weeks later), we will find out the baby's gender.

... and yay for storms.

schooooool's out for summer.

1. Yesterday was the last day of school (yay!). I'm putting in for a transfer in the fall. More on that later (maybe).
2. Craig and Vanessa are at the hospital right now to have their baby girl. Vanessa was induced early this morning. Yay for babies!
3. Most of Luke's family is in town until Sunday. So far, it has caused me to stay up slightly later than usual, but quality visiting has ensued.
4. Yay for season finales... especially The Office (last week), Ugly Betty and Grey's Anatomy (last night). I'm a fan.
5. Yay for my summer job not starting until June 2nd. Free time is a good thing.

and waiting...

my first trimester officially ended on friday, so i'm just waiting and hoping that i will feel better. i realized that i need to reassess my choice of diet because i haven't been quite strict enough with myself. basically that just means that i should be eating my vegetables and be going out to eat less. it should help that after school's out, i'll be taking my lunch to my summer job and not going out for lunch so much like we have been while working at the school. better planning.

so my belly has gotten a bit bigger but it's still at the point where i just look like i've gotten fatter. after a few more weeks, i'll be more recognizably pregnant, but i have to get out of the habit of trying to suck in my tummy (as my mom has always taught me to help me have good posture and carry myself better). it just kind of doesn't feel good when i do it now and i have to constantly remind myself not to do it.

luke and i have decided that we won't be getting a car before the fall. we're not quite sure how everything is going to pan out yet, but we know it's the right decision to wait at least until we know what our fall situation will be like (we don't know the amount of luke's financial aid yet and he'll be in school full-time... then with the baby coming at the end of november ish, i won't be able to work from thanksgiving at least until the next semester begins, depending on what we decide.

i need to mention that we cannot wait to get out of this apartment. we looked at a duplex that is right next to our friends casey and taran and we're hoping to go sign the lease and put down the deposit for it tomorrow. it should be fun having friends as next-door neighbors. they already have big plans for the summer and their newly purchase slip-n-slide :)

let me explain.

i am glad to have gone through the EFY stage and i didn't mean to make it sound like it was just something you get past to get to the real stuff. like i said, i learned so much from EFY and those summers and i wouldn't give them back for ANYTHING. enjoy it while you're there and when it's time to move on, you won't be able to enjoy it so easily. at least that's how it happened for me. i was just done.

oh and i really love orange creamsicles. just saying...

jobs and like, summer and stuff

i now have 2 summer jobs lined up for the summer. one is full-time (temporary) working at Vangent, and one is doing a job for Infoition like I used to before I started working at the high school.

oh, our computer has a virus, but we just happened to purchase a laptop with luke's school loan money yesterday, so that'll have to do for now. my brother kevin is going to come check it out and see if he can save the desktop (pray for my PC!) also, luke's tuition for the summer has been paid, so we're feeling okay right now. things look good for the summer. we decided to cut back on some costs, so we're canceling our cable as soon as the NBA Finals are over :P and won't get anything like that until we move at the end of July. that should save us a little money for the time being.

this'll be the first time 2004 that i'm not doing EFY during the summer. i'll actually get to participate in my family's 4th of July celebrations and Ava's birthday! even thinking about it makes me tear up (i'll just blame it on the hormones) because for a long time my priority has been friends and just doing whatever i wanted during the summers. granted, EFY was a lot of hard work, but it was really just a lot of exhausting fun. i enjoyed it and it taught me so much, but i am really glad to be past that stage and moving into a more eternal family focus, even if it means i'll be in a stuffy office all summer.

all figured out... almost

i decided it would be best to NOT participate in my classroom's field trip to Worlds of Fun today considering strong smells and overexertion still cause me great discomfort. luke is there and got put with all the students who don't do any rides, so he's not having the most fun ever. at least he didn't have to pay for his ticket. he wants to go back soon, so he can actually do some of the fun things that there are supposedly worlds of. i am back at the school with a student who couldn't go on the trip because his foster parents told him he had to participate in the fundraiser if he wanted to go (parents had the option of having their students do the fundraiser or they could just pay for the ticket). we've been in the classroom next door, so i could kind of help out, but now we're taking a little break.

i have a job interview tomorrow at Vangent to do customer support for student financial aid inbound calls. that will be just for the summer and since my sister works in HR there, she got someone to call me just the day after i submitted the application. this summer job (assuming my interview is successful) will be a great help to us this summer, so yay for that.

yesterday, we also received a loan that will make it possible for us to work out our 1 car situation. since luke will be driving to and from JCCC all summer (the shuttle doesn't run in the summers), we have to figure out transportation. the old eagle summit just will not make it with all that highway driving, i'm afraid. also, luke is going to be making another phone call, but should be starting a paper route for the LJWorld here soon. all of those things will put us through the summer until i can go back to work at the high school... then from there we'll figure out what we have to do with Luke in school full-time during the fall (especially when it comes baby time in November). By then we'll know exactly how much of a student loan/grants Luke will be receiving for the fall and spring semesters.

these are not interesting or exciting things to write about, but they are things that have been up in the air for us for quite a while, so yesterday was a very good and accomplishing day (everything was settled kind of all at once after school yesterday).

break's over, but that's kind of what's going on with us right now. i'm just waiting out this last week before my 1st trimester is over, then maybe i will slowly start to feel better each day. that's the hope. and school's out for summer next thursday (wednesday and thursday we get out at 12:00pm), so then i'll start that job on June 2nd (if i get it, which i really am assuming i'll get...you only have to have a high school diploma to be qualified for it --- i know, i'm getting a lot out of this degree of mine).

yay for the fact that it's 1pm already.

the junior buhlers

what's new with the outcalt crew?

i really like this one :) enjoy, kate, seth, and lillie!

yes, more.... and even more to come!

here's the latest!

believe it or not i have gathered laundry today and cleaned the living room. so, i can say confidently that i'm not JUST doing this :P

yesterday was an excellent-feeling day... that is until i got home from the choir concert. i realized when i got there that i had forgotten to eat dinner, then had to stay there for about 3 hours .. FOODLESS. people who know me would say this could be a big problem even if i didn't have a baby feeding off of me. well it was. i was so hungry that on the way home i stopped at mcdonalds (against my better judgement) and ordered a burger. i ate it in the car on the way home, hoping it would save me from the horrible nausea i knew would follow.

big. mistake.

i am home AGAIN today because i have still not been able to just purge this undying nausea... caused mcdonalds and my own carelessness. if i move too much, it (the nausea) gives me a not-so gentle reminder to not try doing that again, so here i am in front of the computer only slightly moving my fingers and right arm, wasting hours. i even made a blog banner for a friend's blog, though she didn't even ask for it. i'm really that bored. i like how it turned out though:

i have a really strange obsession with editing pictures and creating these little things, so if anyone wants a banner, let me know.

i'm bored.

heartbeat, luke's knees

At first I heard a couple of loud sporadic ticks and got really confused. It sounded too loud and strange to be what we were looking for, but then again I wasn't really that sure what it would sound like. She made funny concentrating faces until she finally focused in on a quiet, constant thudding of our little baby's heartbeat. The pulse rate was about 170, she said, exactly as it should be. Luke says it sounded like a man's heartbeat. I didn't cry, but felt a a simple overwhelming joy that such a tiny little rapid heartbeat belonged to a beautiful spirit who has been waiting to come to the earth to gain a body and to be our child.

:) yay.

On another note, Luke had gone to the doctor last week, where they told him he ought to have *both of his knees* X-rayed. They said he might have to have surgery or might have arthritis. He called yesterday about the results and as I got in the car after work, he said "so, I have to have surgery." Then he talked about how he has a bone spurt that needs to be cut out and blah blah blah blaahhh blah blah blah blahblahblabla my husband is a liar!!!!!! He's fine and just wanted to see my reaction. What a dork (but I love him...).

I'm going to the Free State choir concert tonight and am getting paid to support a student "just in case" (she has never needed the support so far). It should be nice.

Oh yeah, and happy 7 month anniversary to Lucas and me yesterday. We celebrated by eating free chipotle for Cinco de Mayo because we work for the school district. It was sweet.

Happy May Day!

www.barnabybright.com

My friend Becky Bliss is in a band with her husband Nathan (who took her last name, how awesome is that...) called Barnaby Bright. They write really beautiful music and every once in a while I will get on their website and just let their songs stream until I have to start them over again. Take a look. Becky is a great girl and I feel she is very deserving of all the success she will achieve through this. Right now she and Nathan are working for NBC and recently wrote the theme song for the new season of Nashville Star, so that's her singing if you see it air.

I am home today because I haven't been able to hold anything down (so much for that one great chipotle day).

So, Luke and I started to watch a movie last night around 9 (after watching the American Idol results show, which was a little surprising... Jason Castro, your time is far spent) and I was so exhausted tired by about 9:45. I felt so bad because this has happened a lot lately every time we try to watch a movie (even if it's earlier in the evening, I end up feeling like I need a nap). If anyone knows Luke, you know that he LOVES to watch movies, so he's resorted to just watching them when I'm asleep. Sorry, Luke! Life changes so quickly, doesn't it..

yay for good music and saltines.

chipotle triumph

I just finished an entire burrito bol from Chipotle. Usually I would feel very large and gluttonous for doing so, but ah the joys of pregnancies are finally beginning to bud. Just about a week ago I got one and could only eat about a third of it, so I'm just glad that I'm beginning to finally have an appetite again. Granted, it took me the course of about 45 minutes to finish it, but I did it. For my starting BMI, I'm really only supposed to gain about 20 pounds in my pregnancy, but I lost about 10 pounds in the beginning weeks, just from not being able to eat or hold things down, so I'm just glad to be able to eat a good meal for once.

I enjoyed Stake Conference today. I enjoy hearing President and Sister Hacking (the mission president and his wife) speak. They will be released soon, but I am grateful for the great examples they are of missionary work and striving to live the full gospel in their lives. I really am grateful for the opportunities I have to gain strength from others and reassess my own. I've been really exhausted the past week. I mean, really I have been since I got pregnant, but this week I have felt especially weak. I think though, I let that fact overwhelm me more than it should. The more I lay around, the worse I feel. That doesn't mean I should go go go, but I do feel physically better when I am able to get some things done during the day. I am at about 9 and 1/2 weeks, so hopefully soon I will not be feeling as nauseous and be able to slowly start eating a little more. That has been the hardest thing for me so far. I am insanely hungry, eat about an apple's size of food, then I'm STUFFED. Of course then about an hour and a half to two hours later I'm STARVING again. I don't mention this to complain, but more to look forward to the weeks where I don't feel that quite as much.


More to come soon.